As I have stated before, I am an Misophonic Introvert who battles with Chemical Depression. Sound rather like I am falling apart at the seams, and some days it does feel that way, but for the most part, taking each day as it comes has been a great method of dealing with time. Let’s face it, “The reason for time is so everything doesn’t happen at once.” True statement that.
Being an Introvert is not a “curse” or a disease or form of insanity, in spite of the Extrovert Advertising. Extroverts are energized through interaction with people. Introverts, not so much. People tend to wear us out. We are ponderers, thinkers, contemplators, and we enjoy (and recharge when) having time to ourselves to process. This does not mean we don’t like people. As a matter of fact, many of my best friends are people. We do enjoy social events and gatherings, but we are not so thrilled with the “life of the party” types drawing attention to us. We like to observe and have quiet interactions with a small group rather than compete in the “how loud and obnoxious can I be” contest.
Misophoniacs are also people too. Misophonia literally means “hatred of sound.” Certain sounds grate on us to the point that we are ready to punch your lights out to make it stop. And unless you have dealt with this agony, chances are you have no understanding about it. I find that sounds I can control (television, my own pen clicking, my own drumming on the desk, etc.) are tolerable. It’s the sounds I cannot control that enrage me. I don’t understand it. I don’t like it. And NO there is no cure for it. YES, I do wear earplugs most of the time. YES, I do want to whack you with a bat for simplistic and sarcastic “remedies” (“if you want to quit coughing, stop breathing”). YES, I will make every attempt to remove myself from the source of the noise. NO, I am not a leper and NO it is not contagious (except, I’ve been told, through heredity). YES, I am trying my best to cope with it. YES, I ask for your understanding.
On the Depression Front, great news so far: It’s been 3 months since the deep purple funk last visited. Can I get a WOO HOO? I have weaned off my meds (not the heart meds, just the voices in my head meds), and haven’t felt this clear headed in a long time. Yes, the weaning was supervised and a close check will be kept. I am beginning to record and chart the progress or set back to see if there is a pattern. I’m kinda geeky that way.
That’s the update for now. I’m off to take my Minion on more adventures.