Last week was one of those weeks where I wish I could have had a clone. The thought of having a clone has its appeal:
- Conversation would always be amazing and informative.
- I could actually BE in two places at the same time
- There would always be someone to go have coffee with.
- Not to mention the sheer power of the sexy awesome dorkiness times TWO!
- I’ve seen me pre-coffee, and I would know instinctively not to speak to me until fully infused.
- The entire coffee industry would LOVE the idea.
- I would know not to bother me while I’m thinking. And I would know that I am an introvert with misophonia, so I would know not to make loud annoying noises around me.
Then said I to myself, or was it to my clone to be, I can never remember, ah, such are the way of things I suppose:
- I could never win an argument with myself.
- I would be impossible to throw a surprise party for me.
- I could never blame my mistakes on anyone….except the clone me…..who is me. Ah, crap!
- I could never “borrow” (steal) soda money from me, because I would know I would do that and I would catch me doing it or I would try to hide it from me and because I know where I hide things, neither one of me would get any sleep.
- I could never give me directions, because both of me are completely directionally challenged and need a GPS to find our way out of a t-shirt.
- And then there’s the whole, “Who used all the hot water?” disruption. Of course, I know I used all the hot water, so why am I even asking me if I used all the hot water, and I really need to get out of my face about it before I punch my lights out.
Hopefully, you can see my dilemma. Alone, I admit to being pretty amazing in a goofball sort of way. Cloned…one of us would have to go, but which one…..? (insert maniacal laugh here)